I found myself thinking about Paris of Troy and His encounter with Queen Helen while he was on a diplomatic visit to Sparta.
Helen was married to Menelaus, the King of Sparta but she had also been promised to Paris by Aphrodite, one of the goddesses she encountered earlier in life.
Though it was Greek mythology, the comparison came to me as I took deep thoughts about the issues of ministry, marriage, divorce, remarriage, legacies and doctrines and then Nigeria and the coming elections.
It is not unusual to compare scripture with scripture in one’s mind or to compare experiences (either personal experience or the experiences of others) and stories (Whether true life or fictional) when ruminating over certain issues requiring wisdom.
You have to weigh the pros and cons of a matter, not with worry but in a bid to form an opinion and test its standing when put into play vis a vis human experience.
A pastor is going through hell in his marriage, he has held on for years trusting God for a change in his story. Story got worse to the point where Pastor's life was threatened.
Pastor's wife packed her things and left. Pastor is alone now with the children.
Can he remarry? Should he remarry?
What about precedents? What about his legacy?
When they are writing his story in God's Generals one day, would he want it documented that he was a husband of two wives?
I remember Rev Martin Luther King Jnr, a glorious man who was a beacon of hope in a dark world. I stumbled upon documents claiming he had many affairs in his lifetime and I was shocked.
It might have been made up or not but such stories makes the legacy of a minister of the gospel quite shaky and yet, wouldn't it be a
miscarriage of justice to keep the Pastor from remarrying simply because he married the wrong woman the first time around? The woman will move on but the man because he is a pastor would remain stuck in a spot as regards marriage?
I remember Dr. Charles Stanley of “In Touch ministry” whose wife left to marry a younger man several years ago.
If not for the church's decision to keep him on as Pastor, he would have been stripped of his position simply because madam saw a younger man and decided she was done with the Pastor as a wife.
It is as if the call of God on a man's wife is predicated upon the success of his marriage and then the fulfilment of his ministry.
If he fails in the first, well, the anointing and the call becomes useless...
I disagree with this with the whole of my heart.
While some Men of God were lucky in marriage, others were not.
In Africa, Ayo Babalola was unlucky in marriage but his legacy as a God's General remained solid, Sadela of Gospel Apostolic Church too didn't find his first marriage rosy (His first wife was a witch and she eventually died after killing their children).
His legacy is still solid.
While it is better to have an A in both marriage and ministry, an F in marriage shouldn't be the end of ministry or negate the veracity of the call of God upon a life.
If a man of God find himself divorced from his wife, should he remain alone?
Should he just abandon the ministry in order to have a life?
What if he falls in love with a woman and they both desire to be together as husband and wife?
Should he damn the consequences and remarry or should he tell the lady "This is not your rest"
Paris married Helen. His decision had grave consequences.
It cost him his life and led to the destruction of Troy.
Is love, no matter how true and feverish worth burning down your legacy for?
Some pastors have little or no impact in ministry, their actions are of very little consequence to the body of Christ but some ministers of the gospel have been entrusted with the torch of the gospel, to light up the world and the reality of men by the power of the Holy Spirit. They know that the opinion of men count as to how their message will be received so they must pay the price for the weight of the responsibility they bear.
I was listening to one of such men of God recently, he is 60 years old now and he insists he would never remarry after his divorce.
He said if he remarries, it means he no longer considers his ministry worthy of standing upon the word of God.
His wife or ex-wife as we should call it has however remarried without a second thought...
Thinking of the coming election in the same light, I considered the issue of mandates, deals and promises and how statesmanship sometimes means acting like Barzillai the Gileadite by nominating someone younger when offered the opportunity to be a noble man.
Barzillai said, "I am 80 years old and I have enjoyed wealth all my life. Why would I want to sit in the court of the King and rule with him when I have a son who can do that...?"
Most men would accept the King's offer without blinking an eye. However, Barzillai wouldn't be wrong to take up the offer too because he deserved it.
David didn't just wake up to hand out juicy positions, when he needed help Barzillai was there for him. After he won the battle, it was only fitting to reward the man who supported him in time of trouble. So, I get it.
Finally, I noticed that a certain political party has successfully hounded supporters of other political groups on Twitter to the background.
They had successfully created a bubble of lies and delusion for themselves without considering the consequences.
I am trusting that they will grow and become more tolerant as they do so.
Year 2023 is the Year of The Greater Light.
It is a year of Great Peace.
Remember this every day.