The Burden

The Burden

Her parents divorced when she was still very young
The details were quite sketchy
As it often was when marriages turn sour
Fingers of fault were pointed in either direction
Her mother left without much ceremony
It had all become a blur
She remembered the warm hug and the tears 
on her mother's face
She remembered the sudden feeling of bereavement
She was seven years old at the time
The feeling was still real but the image had blurred
One day there was a mummy in the house
The next, there was none!
They were living in a two bedroom apartment
Her Parents had one room to themselves
The female children had a room to themselves
The male children slept in the sitting room
The mattresses were ferried into the girls' room 
every morning
and brought out every night like the owl
She had six siblings
Four elder ones and two younger ones
Their father worked with one of the ministries of 
the federal government
He was very comfortable and could afford a 
bigger more befitting
accommodation
But his priorities seemed to be channelled in 
other directions
He was a man with a heart of gold
A giver, a philanthropist and a helper of destinies
As small as their house was
Her father accommodated several destitute people
Widows, single parents, orphans and so on
As small as their accommodation was
On some nights, they had as many as thirty people 
sleeping under their roof
The biological children didn't understand it
They were having barely enough because of all the strays 
their father kept picking up
What sensible man would stretch his resources so thin to
cater to strangers at the expense and sometimes at the 
detriment of his own children?
For her Father, helping the weak get back on their 
feet was an addiction
Her Father didn't become celibate after his divorce 
with their mother
He never remarried though
He had relationships with other divorced women 
and widows
Some of them came to the house and spent time with him
Others he dated on and off over a period of several years
Some even brought their children to share the little space 
they had in the house with them
As she grew up, she noticed something odd
She didn't say anything at first because she was not a telltale
But one afternoon she stumbled into her father and one of the 
ladies he was helping to get back on her feet
That particular lady had been married for about three months
before her husband travelled abroad and practically 
abandoned her
She waited for him for about five years 
before it dawned on her
that she was waiting for a man who had 
forgotten he was ever married
She had been living with his parents all that while
And they had been treating her like a housemaid
Monitoring her movement to be sure 
she was not cheating,
enjoying her daughter-in-law duties while 
closely guarding
the secret that their son had married somebody 
else abroad
in the name of getting his papers and that the person
had given birth to two children for him
By the time she found out and made up her mind 
to start all over
She had nowhere to go
She came to her father for help and in 
his customary nature
He told her to move into the girl's room 
and manage with the 
crowd there until he finds a solution to 
her  problem
She was 10 years old at the time
She got home from school and discovered "them"
Her father's sausage right inside the lady's oven
It was the very first time she was seeing such
Oh Gosh! It was gross! It was yucky!!!
She couldn't even tell anybody even if 
she wanted to
What would she say?
How would she say it?
The only problem with her discovery was the bile
She used to see her father as a godly man who would
help anybody in need just like the good samaritan
After that experience, she started noticing a trend
Her father was sleeping with most, if not all,
the women he was helping
The bile was a very dangerous thing
It polluted everything!
It made her resent rather than respect her father
It skewed her view of many things!
As she grew older, she noticed the pattern
A lady comes crying with her desperate issue
A father lends a helping hand
And the lady later repays her father's kindness 
on his bed
When she was in secondary school
She heard the pathetic story of a lady who had been
seriously abused by the circumstances of life
She directed the lady to her Father
She felt her father would respect her and help 
the lady 
without trying to take advantage of her
The lady came back to her saying 
"She couldn't meet up 
with her Father's condition"
She didn't bother to ask what the condition was
She knew she had sent a hare to a lion for help
When she was in her first year as an 
undergraduate
One of the single parents her father was 
sleeping with
brought his daughter to their house when she 
was to prepare for her University 
Admission examination!
The woman handed her daughter over 
to her Father
She wanted him to guide her and help 
her gain admission
just as he did with his own children
After a few weeks, the young lady told 
her in confidence
that her father had raped her
She was outraged! 
The young lady was only 17 years old!
She called her siblings and told them 
everything she knew
It was time to bell the cat
It was time to tell their father off
Enough was enough!
None of her siblings wanted the responsibility
Though some of them had married and 
she was already in school
They want to avoid having any ill feelings 
with their father
Her father retired and relocated to their 
home town
She got a job in the city and they 
drifted apart
She tried as much as possible not to have
 anything to do with her father
Since she couldn't tell him the truth and
 get him to change
She felt it would be wiser to just avoid him!
She had almost buried the issue when nothing
else came up for two years
Of course, it wasn't as if nothing was happening
But she was not privy to anything
It was a case of see no evil, hear no evil!
Then a cousin called her out of the blue
Her cousin said her father invited her over
to discuss her admission
Before she knew it, her father had her
spread-eagled on his bed
She struggled and fought him but he was 
too strong
She said she was able to escape 
because just 
as her Father was about to penetrate her, 
someone
important came knocking!
That was how she was able to escape or
how she was "saved" from his ramming!
She couldn't believe her ears
She called her Father's best friend and 
reported him
She also called some other prominent 
people around him
She told them everything and asked them to 
warn her father
Her Father told them she was lying
Her Father said "Someone was using voodoo 
to turn his 
children's back on him! 
Her father blamed his enemies, her education, 
feminism ideology, the ancestors, her mother 
and the devil"
He never accepted that he had done 
anything wrong
The people she sent to him called her and 
advised her
to settle whatever rift was between them 
and stop
peddling rumours!
None of the women her father took 
advantage of 
would come out to testify against her 
father
Many of them had gotten married and 
moved on
Those who were still single didn't want 
the label of a victim
That was her burden
Loving her father while preserving her
 conscience 
She wishes she could turn a blind eye
And ignore him while he destroys many 
more destinies
She really wishes she could keep quiet
Eventually, she called a friend
She told him everything
She wanted an intervention 
He prayed about it
Then he called her father
He introduced himself as a child of God
He thanked his Friend's father for all the 
Good deeds he had done over the years
Then he talked about the rape
and sexual coercion charges
Surprisingly, his friend's father started crying
He said "My brother, you came to me in
the name of Jesus! You spoke to me with 
love and affection, you have been patient 
for over one hour! 
Talking and listening! 
You are very well trained.
What do you want me to do?
Her Friend said " I will like you to give your
 life to Jesus"
His Friend's Father: I am a Christian
Her Friend: I agree sir, I am asking that you
 become a new type of Christian
His Friend's Father: Why? I do a lot of good 
and even though I am not perfect, I know God 
rewards the good deeds I do
Her Friend: Jesus didn't come to make us
 good people sir, he didn't come to make bad 
people good! He came to make dead people live! 
In Him is the fullness of God bodily and anyone 
that comes into him partakes of His fullness of God. 
This is called eternal life!
Her friend's father got it
They prayed.
He gave his life to Christ
Everything became new.

Ps: Expecting people who are not Born Again to do 
good without expecting some form of reciprocity is 
simply asking for too much
The man kept saying "I helped all of them with 
my scarce resources, how can my good deeds be 
judged as if it was evil? If I slept with prostitutes 
would it cost that much? I put up with some of 
these people for years! Helping them, sponsoring 
their children!"
Do I owe them anything?
To the carnal mind, he had an argument
As long as Crocodiles can't fly
Unregenerated minds will remain evil
Let us preach the gospel
It is the only power unto salvation and a higher 
life in Christ