The Terrorist

The TERRORIST
(Judges chapters 13-16)
The President summoned the 
Chief of Staff as he dropped the phone. 
“Call up all the Ministers and security chiefs 
for a very crucial Federal Executive Council 
Meeting NOW!” The Chief of Staff was surprised. 
A FEC Meeting? At 12 midnight? 
He wondered what was going on, but from 
the President’s body language, it seemed it 
was good news. An hour later, they were 
all present in the Council Chamber.
The President cleared his throat and chose 
his words. “Ladies and Gentlemen, I called 
you all here for some good news: 
the Terrorist was captured alive about
 2 hours ago…”
There was a loud shout in the Council Chamber, 
the ministers shook hands and gave each 
other high fives. There was a buzz of 
excitement in the air…
The President gave them some minutes
to enjoy the euphoria. 
He then gave them the details how the 
Terrorist was captured. 
“Our Special Agent 009, Delilah was
 very key to his capture. We got intelligence 
report that he loved a certain type of ladies 
and Delilah fitted the bill. 
So we set him up with her and the rest is history. 
He found Delilah irresistible. 
I know many of you men in this chamber 
find her irresistible too!” the President 
paused as the men all laughed. 
Indeed, Delilah reminded most of them 
of Kim Kardashian. The President continued, 
“Kudos must be given to our security chiefs 
for this feat. Now, I want us to look at ways 
to maximize this feat to our advantage, 
knowing that National Elections are 
coming up in 6 months. 
This man has terrorized our people and 
our country for so long. 
We will definitely execute him, but I want us 
to look at ways of getting maximum 
political capital out of this. 
Suggestions, anyone?”
“Your Excellency, you should make a 
National Broadcast tomorrow morning to 
inform the people. 
That will shoot up your rating by about 10%”, 
the Attorney General submitted.
“Yeah, that will indeed shoot up your 
rating sir”, added the Minister for 
Culture and Tourism. 
“But I think we can get more from this. 
Let us plan a National Carnival Week. 
We sell tickets for our people to come for 
the carnival where the major item is 
simply sighting the Terrorist. 
We take him round our major cities, Gath, 
Gaza, Ekron, Ashkelon and Ashdod. 
We know so many stories have been heard 
about this man, how he killed a thousand 
of our soldiers with a donkey’s jawbone…”
“True! Who will forget how he uprooted 
our National Gate and carried it high up 
the mountain on his shoulders?”
They went on and on about the exploits of 
the Terrorist and made plans to use his 
capture to their advantage in the coming 
polls.
Next morning, the President made an 
announcement on the Philistine Television 
Authority. All the Philistines rejoiced at 
the news. They all looked forward to 
sighting this man who had caused them 
so much damage and ridicule…
On the first day of the carnival week, all 
the inhabitants of Gaza were excited. 
The Terrorist was in their city! 
They were actually going to sight the man. 
Stories had been flying around the 
country that he was a giant. 
Some said he had 4 arms. 
So much mystery had been built around 
him that everybody wanted to see him 
live. The hall in which the Terrorist was 
to be shown to the public could 
accommodate two hundred thousand 
people. 
Those struggling to buy tickets 
for the show were half a million. 
The government took advantage of this 
by increasing the price of the tickets. 
The Minister of Finance was happy 
they were raking in so much money 
as Internally Generated Revenue. 
He was sure the President would retain 
him as the Minister when he wins the 
election in 6 months’ time…
That evening, the hall was filled to the brim. 
More than three hundred thousand 
people were in the hall. 
Many paid double the ticket price just 
to see the Terrorist. 
They were all uncomfortable with the heat 
as the air conditioners could not cope 
with the number of people but who cared? 
They were too excited, singing the 
Philistine National Anthem and all such 
songs of patriotism. 
The Public Enemy Number One will soon 
come in and they were all ready to 
ridicule and jeer him.
As he was being led into the hall, 
the Terrorist was being taunted by 
the soldiers. 
“I think he should not be led in by one of us. 
That would be too dignifying for him. 
Let’s get a young boy to do that- his 
humiliation would be more!” 
The other soldiers agreed. 
A few minutes later, the Terrorist was 
led into the hall by a young twelve year old boy. 
As he came into view, there was a loud 
shout from the spectators. 
The President smiled wryly. 
He sensed his victory at the forthcoming polls. 
He turned to the Vice President 
and gave him a thumbs up, “We did it!” 
The entire cabinet was present, all the 
security chiefs. Nobody wanted to miss 
this great day in the entire country.
The Terrorist turned to the boy leading him, 
“please could you lead me to the pillars 
supporting this hall? I just want to lean 
on it to rest- I’ve been standing on my 
feet for several hours now”…
The boy thought about it and wanted 
to refuse, but the thought of this man 
collapsing and denying the people the 
pleasure of seeing him in such a sorry 
state changed his mind. 
He led him to the pillars and watched 
him resting and catching his breath. 
The din in the hall was deafening. 
They were all seriously enjoying this.
The Terrorist lifted up his head and 
prayed, “O Lord God, remember me and 
strengthen me just this once more…” 
He stood in the center of the hall in 
the middle of the two pillars, one to 
his left and the other to his right.
He lifted up his voice and shouted, 
“Let me die with the Philistines!” 
And he pushed. 
And the pillars gave way and the 
building came down. 
The Terrorist died, taking three hundred 
thousand lives with his.
The National Carnival became a National 
Tragedy- people spent their hard earned 
money to buy their own death tickets. 
What an irony.

- Haruna Daniels