The Wayward Path

I was 19 when I met him at a neighbour's 
birthday party. 
She was a single mature aunty and he 
was her senior colleague. 
She encouraged me to date him when 
he kept telling her he liked me.
He was rich, very rich, he treated me 
like a princess and took care of all my 
financial needs.
My parents were separated at that time, 
we lived with my dad while my mum was 
back in the east.
I could have made better choices but 
I thought I had no other choice than to 
become the sugar baby of a sugar daddy.
I was pretty, young and extremely 
vulnerable. 
He took advantage of my innocence and 
dangled lots of carrots before me. 
I sat back to enjoy the life of luxury that 
was suddenly thrust at my feet.
I will never forget the 1st time he took
me shopping! 
The way he spent money on clothes left 
me floating on the clouds!  
The wining and dining in fine restaurants 
and hotels were a constant. 
He had the fine taste and spared no 
expenses.
We became an item and everyone knew!
His friends 
His brother 
His colleagues
My siblings
My friends.....and even my parents!
Yes! My parents knew. 
My dad was retired, the business he 
set up after retirement wasn't generating 
much and so we were left vulnerable. 
Living from hand to mouth. 
It is a terrible thing for a man not to be 
able to take care of his family and 
have to turn a blind eye to the indiscretion 
of his children. 
We all ate from the bankrolling that 
came from that relationship, including 
my mother who was in the east.
I resented my parents at a stage in my 
life for not opening my eyes to other 
choices, for not guiding me away 
from this path I was walking.
I cannot blame anyone for the choices 
I made though. 
I could have taken another route but 
this was the path I chose and I was 
his sugar baby till I was 23.
His wife knew my name, he even once
 took me to his house in the village. 
I looked for every excuse I could find 
to sleep outside my house just to 
spend a night or two with him in some 
luxury hotel.
I became friends with other girls my 
age who were living similar lifestyles. 
Sugar babies with sugar daddies! 
It became a norm, not a big deal 
any longer! 
He said he loved me, I believed him 
and believed I loved him too.
A few times, he talked about making 
me his second wife, but we didn't 
explore that option much. 
We just kept the relationship going 
with an intensity that got us so 
immersed into each other.
He finally helped me get admission into 
the University when I turned 22. 
I saw it as a reward for my years of 
being with him. 
We broke up while I was in year one, 
the relationship was already dying at 
that point.
I struggled to pay my bills through school. 
Dating him opened the door to dating 
other married men after him. 
I decided to quit the lifestyle and starting 
hustling in school by selling 2nd hand 
night wears and pastries.
Life was tough, I slipped a few times and 
dated one or two other married men but 
none was a serious as he was.
Long after I left school and got a good job, 
the circle repeated itself! 
I got involved with another married man. 
I was older, more mature but still foolish. 
Foolish enough to fall for a married man, 
I stayed with him for about 4 years. 
He begged me to marry him with the 
promise of a house in London.
 I turned it down and eventually moved on.
Life is all about choices and sometimes 
we take decisions because we feel we
 don't have another option. 
There is always another option, a better 
option and the better option is never to 
settle for being a side chick.

PS: Today I'm married and in my home 
and if I had a choice I would apologize 
to their wives for being the woman out 
there that caused them pain.