Alero

She was a serial cheat 
A sex addict 
Right from the age of 12, when she 
lost her virginity 
Something happened to her sexually 
She couldn't sleep without masturbating 
And she couldn't do three days 
without sex 
Her uncle was her first 
He lured her into his room one day and 
they did it 
It felt so wrong but he gave her a treat 
afterward 
He gave her 500 Naira to buy whatever 
she wanted and he told her to come 
back and ask for more anytime she wanted 
All she had to do was sleep with him again 
She knew all about sex before then 
She just hadn't done the deed
In their compound in Asaba 
They often took turns peeping through 
keyholes when the students in her father's 
house were doing it 
Their house was located close to the 
federal college of Education 
Her father rented out several rooms to the 
students of the school who were living
off campus 
Their house was a two-storey building 
Her Father, Mother, four children, and some 
other relatives lived on the ground floor 
while the two floors above them were 
rented out 
His father inherited the house and it was 
his source of livelihood 
He was "Landlord" and she was the 
landlord's daughter
Her mother was into the sale of fairly used 
clothes shipped into the country in bales 
The students patronized her heavily for 
her Grade A (Good quality) products 
Their mother didn't have much time to 
sit around 
Their father spent the day playing 
Checkers and drinking local gin
His income from the house was more 
than enough to support his lifestyle 
Her two older brothers were often out 
with their friends doing boys stuff 
She was the first girl 
Her younger sister was 15 months old 
One of those "Mistake babies" 
So she was often home by herself 
Apart from her brothers, they had 
other relatives living with them 
Three of them were her father's 
stepbrothers 
One, the one closest to her in age 
became particularly friendly towards her 
And it was he that broke the dam of latent 
fire within her 
By the time she was fifteen she had 
mastered many things 
Chief among them was having sex at least 
four times a week 
Her Uncle was seeking admission at the 
time and he had all the time in the world 
He was her "lesson teacher" at home so 
her parents didn't suspect a thing 
Sometime in 2006, her uncle left for 
Port-Harcourt that was when it became 
obvious that she was in trouble 
She simply couldn't cope without sex 
The first She was living in a "Hostel" and 
horny guys can smell a girl in heat 
from afar off 
That was how she got into sex with 
multiple partners 
Word spread like wildfire 
There is a hot hole to poke! 
And boys queued up to poke it! 
She got pregnant thrice and got rid 
of it 
By the time she finished secondary 
school, she had become an "issue" 
for her parents 
Her father was the first to suspect her 
sexual activities 
Then her brother caught her having 
sex with a guy under the staircase 
They beat the guy to a pulp and reported 
her to their mother 
Her mother had the "sex" talk with her 
But her mother was talking to a wall 
She was way past reasoning with 
Sex had become a must have! 
The very evening after her mother 
talked with her, she had her bath and 
sneaked into the room of one of the 
students upstairs 
The way she felt whenever she was not 
having sex, was the same way a drunk 
or a drug addict feels without alcohol 
or drug 
It was so bad that she would sometimes 
sit in a bar or a hotel reception with a guy
while waiting for a room to be available 
and masturbate right there 
And while she was having sex with one guy, 
she would be imagining she was with 
another 
Being alone was tough for her 
She was either watching pornography or 
fiddling with her genitals 
She does not think about sex
She was a sex maniac 
The day her mother caught her in bed 
with a neighbour's son three years 
younger than her 
Her mother declared a state of emergency 
Her case was termed spiritual 
Her mother started dragging her from 
church to church 
The consensus was that she needed
deliverance Her mother would learn a hard 
lesson from their interaction with spiritual 
people 
Men are men and many a man with blood 
flowing through his veins will submit to 
the lure of a luscious body and free sex 
from a beautiful 19-year-old who would 
offer herself to them with tears in her 
eyes 
"Please, do me and then deliver me" 
was her line 
It always worked 
She gained admission into the University of 
Benin at the age of 21 
By that time, her mother was happy to 
be rid of her and her stinking scandals 
She had been diagnosed with nymphomania 
and it was said to have no cure 
The knowledge of what was wrong with her 
helped her a little 
It was compulsive sexual behaviour. 
It has its triggers 
She was advised to use a phone without an 
internet connection in order to curb her 
pornography addiction, she also started 
jogging in the evenings to control her 
hyperactive tendencies 
She was encouraged to get some 
academically inclined female friends and 
perhaps take-up religion 
Religious people are often serious-minded 
Their mode of dressing and lifestyle would 
likely discourage the triggers she was prone 
to
She did 
The doctor also told her a new environment 
was the best place to start exercising control 
over her addiction and reality as a human being 
She was determined to change 
She was determined not to become a 
laughing stock in the University 
She was a joke by the time she left
parent's house 
She could barely walk down the street 
without taunts and jeers ringing around 
from the same boys she was sleeping 
with or those who were hoping to sleep 
with her later 
She was fair game 
By the time she gained admission into the 
University she had been gang-raped twice
She had become a thing to her tormentors 
They no longer saw her as a human being 
The university environment was for her an 
opportunity to start her life over 
She had all the information she needed and 
she was very determined to make a success 
of her life 
She kept away from every talk of 
relationship or sex 
The presence of so many people in the 
hostel (especially her room where they 
had bed space owners and squatters 
aplenty) helped with the masturbation 
It wasn't as if she stopped totally but 
it reduced drastically 
She got herself an analog phone
and joined the prayer warrior's 
department in the school 
They were the most frugally dressed 
of the "born again" groups on campus 
The guys acted like Moses and the 
ladies acted like Mary 
Everybody called everybody brother 
or Sister 
They were practically wearing sack clothes 
It was exactly what the doctor recommended 
She learned to throw herself into fasting and 
prayer in order to destroy the desires of the 
flesh and mortify her body 
The religious denomination she dressed was 
very big on dressing and appearance 
That was how holiness was judged 
Guilt was also a big deal 
There was a mourners bench for those 
who "missed it" (Dipped their hands into sin) 
Earrings or any form of beauty enhancements 
were prohibited 
It was good for her 
One day during the second semester, she 
met one of her former lovers in the bank 
One look at him was all it took
She followed him out of the bank to his
car and introduced herself
He didn't recognize her in the garb
she was wearing
He knew what she wanted
He took her to a hotel and finished
the story
That was how she started spiraling
again
She began an era of deceit and 
hypocrisy
She needed the fellowship to sort of
launder her image
While she dived into her old pattern
By the time she got to final year, the
venom had spread into the fellowship
A brother in the fellowship asked her
out
He seriously wanted to marry her
She agreed after a while
He took her home to meet his parents
during the Christmas break
By the third week of January, she
discovered she was pregnant
The fellowship suspended the two of
them
They graduated and got married two
days before she delivered her first
son
Three weeks after she delivered her 
child
The strange desire started building 
again
She didn't know what triggered it
She was living with her husband's family
while he was NYSC duty in the north
She started masturbating again
She felt it would take the edge off the
strange fire burning in her members
When that didn't work, she started
watching pornography again
Eventually, she started sex chatting
and having phone sex with some of
her old lovers
It kept building and building until
she was chatted up by a guy and
she met with him at a hotel
Three months after she started cheating
again
Her mother called her in the middle of
the night
Her mother said she had a strange dream
Her mother said she saw her being
led about naked in a market like a goat
that is for sale
Her mother sent her the phone number
of the Brother in Jeans and T-shirt
She reached out to the brother in Jeans
and T-shirt the next morning
She told him about her strange battle
with self-destruction
She said "I don't like sleeping around
I don't like cheating, I don't like
masturbating or watching pornography
I hate myself for doing these things,
but I cannot help it sir
I have tried everything I can to stop
My head is always paining me from 
thinking and trying very hard to stop
I have been born again before sir, it
didn't last for long
It felt as if i was suppressing myself
forcefully and at a point i felt like
exploding...
I don't know if it is possible for God to
help me.
Can you help me, sir?
The Brother in Jeans and T-shirt told
her she was never born again
Joining a church due to the counsel of
a therapist does not translate to
being born again
Practicing holiness does not translate
to being born again
He led her to Christ and go her filled with
the Holy Spirit 
After she started praying in tongues, he
told her to read as many chapters of 
the book of John as she could read 
aloud daily
He told her to lay her hand on her
chest and say after him
"I give the Holy Spirit complete authority
over my emotions, my will and my
intellect! I give the Holy Spirit complete
Authority over my body, soul and spirit,
Today, in the name of Jesus, I hand
over the full control of my members to
the Holy Spirit
I have been healed of every demonic
affliction, I belong to Jesus Christ now,
I am full of the Holy Spirit"
That was all
She didn't believe it
She was full of joy in a strange way
The phone conversation was less than
ten minutes long
She kept muttering under her breath
"I belong to Jesus now!
I belong to Jesus now!"
That night, as she slept, she saw a
man digging up the foundation of 
a great white building
She asked him "Sir, what are you doing"
The man said "I am correcting a fault
in the foundation, I own this house
now and I am renovating it"
She woke up elated
She called the Brother in Jeans and 
T-shirt
She said "Sir, I saw Him! I saw the 
Holy Spirit in a vision! He said He is
my owner and He is renovating me!"
The Brother in Jeans and T-shirt 
screamed for joy
He said "Even if you didn't have that
vision, the Word of God says you are
His tabernacle! His dwelling place"

PS: It's been  17 months and 7 days
(77 weeks)
I had wanted to write her testimony 
from the day she saw that vision
But she was scared she would relapse
and wanted to be sure it was real
I told her the word of God needs no
confirmation
The confirmation was another
dream her mother had
In the dream, her mother saw her
break off the chain on her neck
and as soon as she did, she was
covered with a bright light!
The yoke of demonic addiction was 
broken totally
Glory be to God

GSW's notes: Another woman who
had a very similar problem wrote
to me recently
She was more concerned about her
husband cheating on her than getting
help for her sexual addiction 
issues
She kept crying "My past is catching
up with me, don't let this girl snatch
my husband! I am cheating on him
but he didn't know it. Help me to get
him to stop cheating on me"
Her eyes were on the wrong end of
the lane
I am praying that she will see as she 
ought to and make the right decision
as soon as possible
Are you lost in a negative habit?
Are you lost in a negative pattern?
Are you lost in a compulsive habit?
Yield to the Holy Spirit now
He alone has the power to transform
your reality