Sunrise at Dusk

Ten months ago, I received a 
distress mail form a young lady
She was about eight months pregnant
She was totally fed up with her
marriage and wanted to call it
quit
I was patient enough to listen
to her
Her husband was a very handsome
banker
The family lives in Abuja
They have a son
The marriage was about four years
old
She said her marriage was hell
Her husband was a selfish and self
absorbed man who liked the idea
of being married but practically
just wanted to remain single
She paid the rent and catered for
the schooling of their child
He bought a generator but she
dare not touch it
He bought DSTV but she dares
not touch the remote
He didn't care about her in any way
He was an overlord whose wishes
must be carried out expressly
He expected his wife's satisfaction
to come from satisfying him
He was the king of the hill
They had been having issues on and
off since they got married
Two of his younger ones were living 
with them and he felt it was important
that he put her in her place before
them so that they don't regard him
as a weakling
She had been told by a friend that
the men from his part of the country
are loving and caring naturally but
they will do anything to prove to their
family members that they are macho!
Her friend's words were apt
He was okay when they were alone
but he was a monster whenever 
his siblings were around
The issue of his siblings was a 
slippery slope
She couldn't do anything about it
If she says he should send them
packing, she would most likely be
the one sent packing
They were young graduates trying
to find their feet in life
He was the oldest son and he was
working in a commercial bank
He had five younger ones
Two of them were with them 
temporarily until they could get a job 
and rent an apartment
They try as much as possible not
to get in her way but they were of
no help
They treated her like "wife"
She had to cook and tidy the house
She also had a nine to five job and
a toddler
She was also pregnant
They make no demands of her but
they are also of no help or support 
to her
They cook their meals when she
didn't cook
When she cooked, they eagerly
ate whatever she made and left the 
dishes for her to wash
It was a very tough season for her
Her husband was untouched
by the feelings of her infirmity
He cared more about looking good,
chilling with his friends and acting
lordly!
She had complained bitterly several 
times about his nonchalant attitude
towards their marriage
It was like pouring water on a duck
He acted as if she was just making
issues out of nothing
Even when she showed him his glaring
lapses, he took it out on her as a
fault finder and an accuser of the
brethren
He would keep malice for days
and sometimes resort to insulting
her parents for not training her well
or tell her she had lived too much 
of a sheltered life and that she
should grow up!
When she had her first child, her mother
sent some money and clothes from the UK
where her mother was a resident nurse
Most of her siblings and her father 
also lived in the United Kingdom
She was also a citizen
She came to the country to observe
her National Youth Service and saw
this fine boy who was hell-bent on
marrying her
She tried her best to fend him off
He was very serious and she decided
to pitch her tent with him
She also got a job with an NGO
during the NYSC and the pay was 
good
They were married a year after they
met
They had a blissful three months
His siblings arrived
She got pregnant and all hell
was let loose
She bore his attitude graciously
during the pregnancy
She cried most nights but when
her parents sent the gift for the 
baby, she expected him to call them
and say thank you
He refused
He acted as if it was their duty to
cater to their baby
She felt his attitude was rude and
conceited and told him so!
He threw everything they sent out
of their apartment
He said she was disrespecting him
over cheap things her parents
picked up from charity stores in the UK
Her parents had done nothing but
supported them in cash and kind 
from the outset
Her mother was especially a devout
Christian whose plea of patience and
endurance kept her from picking
her passport and running to
the United Kingdom
She took exception to his attitude
and called his mother to report him
His mother said "He had always
been temperamental like his father
and she should just leave him for
a while until he calmed down!"
His mother was like that
A good woman but someone who
always made excuses for her son
regardless of what the case was.
She was not brought up with a
mindset of taking nonsense and
tolerating madness
Her parents were the happiest 
couple she knew
She had always seen marriage as
a "do together" affair
What she was going through was
strange and very surreal to her
She continued to manage, hoping
he would change while trusting
God that her mother's prayers
would bear some good fruits
But things only got worse
On the day she decided to leave,
he sent her a message at 4 pm
that he would be coming home
with some friends and she was
to make pepper soup for them
She was still at the office at the
time
She was heavily tired and gets
tired easily
She went to the market to buy
pepper soup ingredient
From the market, she went to the
school to pick her son by 6 pm
When she got home he was not
at home yet
She decided to sleep a little until
7 pm to regain some strength
She was awakened by his voice
by 8:30 pm
"Hey, hey, hey, wake up!" 
He shouted "Where is the 
pepper soup"
She woke up and apologized
She said she had bought the 
ingredients but didn't make it
before she slept off
He looked at her like she was 
good for nothing; hissed and
left the room
When she eventually stood up,
she started feeling a strange 
headache
She could hear her son crying
somewhere
She waddled to the sitting room
and found him crying because
someone changed the TV channel
from the cartoon channel to
champions league
She turned to her husband and
asked him to please let the boy
watch the cartoon until 9 pm when
he would be tucked in bed
She was too tired and the headache
was getting worse with the noise
Her husband told her to get out
She smiled and changed the channel
Her husband looked at her, smiled,
carried the serving bowl on their
dining table and smashed it against
the wall
How the splinters missed her left eye
and her son was a miracle
As if that was not enough, her husband
went into the kitchen, took a knife
and walked slowly to the television set
When he got there, he cut the DSTV
cable and every other cable connected
to the Television set
Her son was too scared to scream
When her husband was done, he
walked to the dining and sat down
with his head in his hands.
She stood up and started shouting
She couldn't believe he did what
she witnessed
He could have injured her
Over football?
She wanted to walk up to him and
ask him why he was so mean and
reckless
His younger ones held her
What?
They didn't hold him when he was
misbehaving but they held her from
approaching him
She struggled with them for a while
Eventually, she turned and left the
sitting room with her son
She sent her mother a message
explaining to her all that had 
happened
She was tired of the house
She picked her phone and booked
a ticket to Lagos
Her parents have a building in Lagos
A block of four flats
Three of the flats were rented out 
while one was fully furnished and 
kept for the use of family members 
who arrive home from the UK or 
have anything to do in Lagos
Her heart wanted to be anywhere but
that house
She was done with the marriage
That night, her husband didn't sleep
at home
He went somewhere to watch the
football game and stayed out all 
night
There was no text message or chat
message expressing remorse for his
actions
He didn't even bother telling her he
wouldn't sleep at home but he told
his younger ones
She knew he told them because
they were unperturbed by his absence
and yet neither of them came to her
to calm her down when she got
worried that something might have
happened to him
It was emotional abuse at its best
She called her boss in the morning
and explained that she needed some
time off because of her baby
Her boss approved her maternity
leave immediately
She packed her clothes and those
of her toddler and left the house
She didn't see any reason to change
her mind
It was over
She boarded the flight and arrived
in Lagos around noon
She went straight to her parent's 
flat
She settled in with her son
Later in the day, she spoke with her
mother and told her about her 
resolve to leave the marriage and
return to the UK
Her mother tried very hard to talk
her out of it but she was adamant
Her father also called and assured
her things will get better
Marriages have all sorts of issues
at the beginning but gets better
with time and understanding
She told her father she was done
Her mind was made up
He was an oaf and she was not
going to remain in a marriage where
all that was left was violence and
bitterness
She called the Brother in Jeans
and T-shirt
They talked for hours
She just needed to unburden
He tried to persuade her to take
some time and let things cool
down
She said no
She was done! 
It was over!
The Brother in Jeans and T-shirt
prayed for her
A week later, her mother called
the Brother in Jeans and T-shirt
she said "My brother, I had to tell
my daughter's friend to get me the
phone number of a man of God
she will listen to and this phone 
number was sent to me.
I want you to step into this matter
and make sure this home does not
break.
Her husband is not an evil man, he
is just a typical man who likes to
keep up appearances and feel
respected. I am sure he regrets
his actions but his pride and ego
wouldn't let him admit that
I don't want my daughter's home
to crash due to some childish
tantrums from both side
I am convinced this issue will
be resolved
I have spoken with her but she 
kept insisting she wanted to
end the marriage
Kindly speak with her and appeal
to her"
The Bother in Jeans and T-shirt
called her and did as her mother
requested
She said the chapter was closed
She was done!
The Holy Spirit said "Let this matter
rest"
The Brother in Jeans and T-shirt
stopped talking about it
Three weeks later, she called
She announced that she had 
delivered her baby and would
like the Brother in Jeans and
T-shirt to name the baby
Her mother also arrived in Nigeria
from the UK for the naming
ceremony and to see if the rift
in her daughter's home can be 
settled
By this time she had contacted
estate agents in Abuja to help
her secure an apartment
She had started furniture shopping
and considering the location of 
a new creche for her children
Her mother reached out to her
husband
Her husband was angry too
He was angry that she dared to
leave their matrimonial home with
his children just like that
The more she pleaded, the more
her husband said he was no longer
interested in the marriage too
Neither party would budge
Her mother begged the husband to
be present for the baby dedication
The husband agreed
Her mother called the brother in
Jeans and T-shirt
She insisted he had to come for
the naming ceremony
The event was scheduled to hold
at 2 pm
The Brother in Jeans and Sister
Valentina (A member of PSSBC)
got there
He was given the programme
A pastor from another denomination
has also been invited
The pastor was to name the baby
while the Brother in Jeans and
T-shirt will bless the couple
The baby was named Ose, 
throughout the ceremony, the
couple could barely look at 
each other
The anger was obvious
After the naming was concluded,
the Brother in Jeans and T-shirt
was asked to bless the baby
He told the husband to drape his hand
around his wife's shoulder
He lifted up his hands and blessed
the name of the Lord on their behalf.
Just then, he saw a sun rising from 
the East in the evening time
Wow!
He said what he saw out loud and
pronounced a new chapter for the
home and the marriage
A marriage of bliss and great joy.
Everybody said Amen.
After the event, the brother in
Jeans and T-shirt spoke with him
and then he spoke with her
Her husband said "I have begged
her but she won't even soften up
to me"
The wife said "See the way he
is strutting about lackadaisically
as if he is everyone's boss? I am 
so sure we are done!
The Brother in Jeans and T-shirt
left their house around 4:30pm
He assured her mother that God
will take control of the marriage
Her mother believed and said "Amen"
Her husband's flight out of Lagos
was for 6:30 pm that evening
Her husband also left as soon as
the ceremony was over
Everything went silent for about a 
two months
Her mother returned to the UK but
continued to call to check on their
progress
In the second week of December 2019, 
She called the brother in Jeans and
T-shirt to announce that she would
be returning to her husband's house
in Abuja in January
She said all hatchets had been buried
In February 2019, the Brother in Jeans
and T-shirt met with the two of them
in Abuja
They took pictures and spent some 
time together
On the 6th of September 2020,
she wrote a long testimony on the
PSSBC Minister's Whatsapp group.
She concluded the testimony by
saying "I want to give God the glory
for my family, my husband has not
started washing plates o 
but he has been the best 
husband in the year 2020.

PS: God stepped in
Is your married in turmoil at the
moment
Entrust all to God
He is able

GSW's notes: I know a couple
The husband wanted to divorce
the wife because the wife had
been so mean and unreasonable
for seven years
He was fed up
He went to a lawyer and started
divorce proceedings
His friend told him to pretend
all was fine at home until the 
papers were served
His wife came to him one night
They made love
He made goodbye love to her
He knew it would be the last
time
Two weeks later, the wife came
back with pregnancy report
They had been waiting on the 
Lord for a child for eight years
What was the difference?
God!
The wife became born again 
and repented of her ways
The Lord had mercy on her and
rewrote her story
The night she went to make love
to her husband was the first
time she would initiate sex ever
She was so mean, sex had to be
earned through hard work
but the Holy Spirit softened her
The pregnancy report and her 
change in attitude melted her
husband's heart
The marriage is thirteen years
old now and they have two
children
I love the High King of Zion
I love the one that is the Love
within me
Glory be to the Father of all
who dwells in me
You do wonders and I marvel
everyday!
Wow!
Glory be to your Holy name O Lord!