The Tussle

The Tussle

His mother wanted him to marry her best friend’s daughter

They had been friends for several years and they had gone through a lot together

When she was sick to the point of death many years before it was her friend that fought for her life with everything she had

It was like the friendship between David and Jonathan

Their souls have merged into one

His mother’s friend also had a fanatical reason to agree to the plan

His mother practically paid her friend’s ransom fees when she was kidnapped years before

Everyone had given up on her but his mother didn’t

His mother turned out to be right

Her friend was not dead and the kidnappers returned her hail and hearty once the ransom was paid

Their friendship was more than a knitting of the soul

It was extraordinary and all and sundry came to celebrate it

At first he was flattered that the pretty lady was offered to him

It was surreal and as a guy, it was very helpful to have such a soft landing

He didn’t have to go through a series of heartbreaks and rejections like some of his friends

He knew where he was going

His mother would say

“My friend and your wife would be coming over to pay us a visit today, you must have your bath and just make a cameo appearance, let her see you all handsome and go back home dreaming of you”

It was fun

The seed was successfully planted in his heart and it germinated

He was very sure he would marry her

And so was she

When her mother told her he was her chosen husband she wanted to resist

Why would anybody pick a husband for her in this day and age?

She was not crippled, blind or nursing any infirmity

She shouldn’t be restricted

She should be allowed to make her own choice

Though her mother had been saying it since she was a teenager

She felt it was just wishful thinking

She faced her studies and prayed that her own husband would come in due time

They were admitted to different universities and both of them lived their lives as they wanted to

The problem was the seed had a strong hold on him and he never really wanted to displease his mother

The same applied to her

They both had relationships but steered clear of anything that would bring shame to either family

The cockerel their mothers groomed over the years at the back of their minds always crowed when they were going too far

They both graduated from the university without any entanglements and with good grades

As soon as they graduated their parents had a meeting

It was time to step up the plan, rev things up

His mother told him he must start seeing her

Her mother told him the same

They were both comely, educated and of the same social class

They went to the movies, the park, the beach and other recreation centers

Perhaps it was written

Perhaps it was by sheer happenstance

They both fell in love

They made love for the first time on her 23rd birthday celebration

The crowd had come and gone and their parents were discussing politics when he pulled her away from the sitting room

She followed him to her own room in her parent’s house

He had that freedom since he was young

They were like siblings

He kissed her

She kissed him

The cock crowed three times

She was sure she would marry him and so was he!

He was posted to a state in the south-south for his NYSC

Though he studied agriculture, his passion had always been broadcasting

He went to the state’s TV station for auditioning

He was taken in a flash

His command of the English diction was superb

More than that his delivery style was unique

He was born to read the news

She was also posted to a state in the south-south for her NYSC

It was more of a confirmation that the weavers of fate had them in mind

Her NYSC post was a mere 50 minutes’ drive from his location

After the initial orientation week, she was posted to a school

She made sure she was in his flat in the neighbouring state every Friday

She left for her place of primary assignment on Sunday evening or early hours of Sunday morning

They were as good as married and lived like that

One day when he was in the final year, he left the office after reading the late night bulletin and found himself in a traffic gridlock at around 11:30pm

All the vehicles were at a standstill

He alighted and decided to walk home

His apartment was like twenty minutes’ walk from the television station

He was determined to get home early and catch some sleep

He trudged on, defying the noise around him

Just as he got to a T-junction very close to his house

He heard a song

The song had been sung in his mother’s church for years

But at that moment, the song carried a strange spirit that made him shiver

He turned to look at the source of the song and he saw an open air crusade ground

He had heard the noise from the place from afar and tuned it out

But the song was too compelling to ignore

He turned around and walked into the crusade ground

The pastor ministering made an altar call

Do you want to give your life to Jesus?

Come now!

Do you want to do away with the yoke of life?

Come to Jesus now!

He didn’t have any yoke that he knew of neither was he bearing any burden

Yet he found himself walking towards the wooden altar

It just felt natural and right to give his life to Jesus at that moment

The minister led them to Christ and he became born again

It was the happiest season of his life

The counsellors came and collected his detail

He willingly gave them! There was a longing in his heart that cannot be sated by mere words

The following Friday his girlfriend came to his apartment as usual

He found himself unwilling to sleep with her as he had usually done

He couldn’t believe it

He once promised himself after deflowering his girlfriend that if he ended up not marrying her, the man that did so would have to work very hard for many years to equal and surpass the number of times he had slept with her while they were dating

She came on to him

He resisted her

She didn’t get it

What had she done?

She had been away from him for one week and she felt hurt that he didn’t want to sleep with her

He told her he had given his life to Christ

She laughed

So what?

He didn’t know how to explain to her that he just didn’t have the urge to do anything like that with her anymore

 She was infuriated                           

“Are you dumping me? Be man enough and say so!”

He knew it was the sexual frustration that was speaking through her!

He ignored her

The next day she packed her bag and left

He neither came to her during the night nor tried make amends with her as she packed

They had had misunderstandings before but it was never that gruesome

She left without saying a word

She called her mother and reported the developments to her

His mother called him

“What did I just hear? You this child, what has entered into you?”

He didn’t know how to explain it

He had a sudden distaste for sleeping with her

Perhaps it was a momentary thing, he just didn’t feel like having sex at the moment

He didn’t understand why it should be such a big deal

He was a grown man, he has a right to live his own life, what had he done wrong?

Christmas break came and he went home

His mother gave him the cold shoulder right from the moment he got home

He tried to speak with her, appeal to her

His mother said before she can be happy, he must go and make peace with her friend’s daughter

The more all the women (His mother, his mother’s friend and his girlfriend) were insisting on freezing him out until he did their will, the more he was determined not to do it

It felt as if they were determined to control his life

He used to think he was powerless without their support but not anymore

The break was for two weeks, when his mother realized he would rather go to church in the evening than go to her friend’s house to see his girlfriend, his mother gave him an ultimatum:

“It is either you do my will or leave my house”

He packed his bags and he travelled straight back to the South-South

He celebrated Christmas and New Year with the local church he was attending

On January 3rd of the following year, she showed up at his apartment

It seemed they realized the initial strategy of force didn’t work and they decided to tow another line

He welcomed her

She came with fried meat, cake and other provisions from his mother

She knelt down and apologized to him

“I went too far, I am very sorry! My mother has scolded me and so has your mother, please stop fighting us”

He accepted her apology, she went to the market, cooked a very delicious meal

He laid his hands on the food and blessed it

He ate

When it was 4pm, he told her she would have to leave

’I am a Christian now, please, I don’t want people to think I am a hypocrite! I really want to practice what I preach, if you leave now you will be at your station before 6pm’

Her countenance changed immediately

“Are you sleeping with someone else? Are you getting it from anybody else? How can a sexually active men suddenly start behaving as if he was a virgin or a novice? I don’t understand! I am sleeping here tonight”

He didn’t argue with her

Later that evening, he called his fellowship leader and explained his ordeal

The fellowship leader invited him over to his own room

“Sleep here brother, let her have your apartment and please pray that the Holy Spirit will intervene in this matter”

By the time he got home the next morning, she was gone

He knew trouble was brewing but he didn’t care

Two months later, a lady was also posted to the Television station as a newscaster

She was beautiful, a Christian and she made his heart sing

She studied English and they had an unbelievable chemistry both on and off the set

His heart longed for this lady but where would he take her to?

He knew if he truly loved her, he shouldn’t drag her into the middle of a war

The battle was raging and the three women would take it out on her

She loved him. It wasn’t just about the chemistry!

He was a Christian, a good listener and he was very patient!

She knew he had intention! It was very obvious but he didn’t express his intention

What is the problem?

He eventually explained his dilemma to her

“As a friend” he sought her advice

His explanation put her mind at rest

At least she confirmed that her instincts were right and he wanted in

There were just many adversaries

They finished serving and he got retained in the TV station

She got a job at another TV station in Lagos

She approached the brother in Jeans and T-Shirt

He was a News producer at her new place of employment

”I love him but I don’t know if I should just walk away or if he would get out of this in one piece”

The brother in Jeans and T-shirt told her within a month she shall have answers to her enquiry one way or the other!

Two weeks later, the TV station she was working with employed him as a news anchor!

He didn’t even apply

He applied for a job at another TV station in Lagos and travelled to the station for auditioning

The head of presentation at the station referred him to the Tv station and he was employed immediately

That same month, the news broke that his ex-girlfriend had gotten pregnant for a businessman in the south-south

She did her traditional and court wedding a few months later

His mother had no option but to move on from the episode

The siege was over

They got married a month later


PS: This event happened in 2014

He is now a news anchor with one of the biggest TV stations in Nigeria

She now owns her own Make up and make-over studio

They are blessed with a daughter

Is there a contention over your marital destiny? Are you hanging on by the threads and you cannot say if there is a future in your relationship or if it was just a waste of time?

Are you single and ready but find yourself without a spouse

God settled Ruth and turned Naomi from Mara to sweetness

I speak to the North and South winds on your behalf

I command your marital destiny to be settled

Husbands, locate your wives

Wives be found by your husbands

Let there be clarity of purpose

I decree that the lines have fallen unto you in pleasant places

Whatever might have been the reason behind your delay, I command them to give way now!

I welcome the testimonies!

The wedding bells are ringing